Near-Death Experience

This afternoon I experienced my worst nightmare.

Try not to laugh. My husband couldn't help himself though, even when he realized the seriousness of the situation.

Have I previously mentioned my extreme arachnophobia? Well. I'm generally a rather brave person. Blood, vomit, dirty diapers? No problem. Bring it! Skydiving, marathoning, parasailing? Yes, please. Even my other deep-seated, slightly irrational fear of serial killers has nothing on this. I have convinced myself that I would fight back using the mad skills I learned from self-defense classes, kickboxing, and Oprah specials (oh, yes). However, there is no fighting spiders. Something to do with all the legs. *shivers*

My big fear? Having a spider crawl on or in front of me while driving.

(Are you laughing yet? Pfft.)

The problem is, when it comes to spiders, I become a completely irrational, screeching, jumping freak. It's like a nerve damage problem. No matter how much I try to control the flailing and screaming, put an eight-legged monster in front of me, and I lose control. I've always been afraid that if a spider got to me in a car, I might cause a freeway pileup.

So there I was, minding my own business, chatting to my husband on my (hands-free!) cell, when a spider appeared on the INSIDE of my windshield. Cue MAJOR panic attack. Thankfully, I was sitting at a stop light, so I didn't crash into anyone. There was a gas station just before the light, so I was praying the spider wouldn't move before I could get to it and jump out. No such luck. The fat little beasty started opening and closing it's mouth at me in an attempt to hiss (spiders DO hiss, don't argue!), and then started crawling up the windshield closer to my face. At this point I'm sure all my husband heard on the other end of the line was high pitched squealing and hyperventilation. Luckily, the light changed, so I drove with my head cocked to the side and as far back as possible. Just in case. Pulled into a no parking zone, jumped out and proceeded to scream and flail, before removing my sandal and dealing the hideous monster a death blow. (Followed, of course, by more squealing.)

Husband's biggest concern during this interaction? That I would make a fool of myself. Ha! Not scared of that, clearly. Done and done! (Psh. Called my sister while still shaking afterward since her irrational fear of moths makes her much more sympathetic!)

I survived this round. However, husband has a major spider hunting task in my car tonight, as I may not be so lucky next time.

EURGH!

Picture this

A grown man, sweating profusely, walks two miles carrying a four-foot tall bush, whilst ducking low-hanging trees and amused pedestrians. Meanwhile his wife follows along with the dog and a serious case of the giggles.

That's our weekend in a nutshell.

It may not be hiking the rainforest, but it's always an adventure with us.













The jasmine vine looks lovely on the patio, and it smells divine, though it was a bit more work than he expected trekking it home.

Not for children

Prompted by JJ's post about her blog rating, I went off to check my own. Apparently this blog is rated R for using sex 4x (really?), whore 2x (interesting), and hurt 1x (wtf, why is 'hurt' rated R?). I am very impressed with myself. Or slightly embarrassed. Hard to say.

Bangkok Charades

Nothing much to say today. I'm stuck deep into research since I keep finding holes in my research for every new chapter I work on. I'm crafting a new opening scene for chapter three, which alleviates some 'show vs. tell' problems, and it seems to be working, which is exciting.

I'll leave you with a great naughty comic for the day, which JJ should especially love since she lives in Bangkok. Enjoy!

Bubba Rub and Lil Sis

Husband pointed me to this link. Oakland's Whistlin' - Whoo woo! Gotta love the local news here - Oakland's always up to something interesting.

Click on #1 "The original newscast..." The end is particularly worth watching when he drives down the wrong side of the street missing two cars and running a stop sign. And "the alarm clock" bit is priceless.

If you can handle it #2 "The remix..." is worth a view as well..